Respite

A few weeks ago I went and did an intake visit with the Respite Center. My kids have gone there twice now, for about two hours. They love it there. Today I used that time and I went to my therapist. Oh, I needed that. I'm going again in two weeks. I'm so grateful for the resource. I cannot afford to pay a babysitter. I already have one, every Wed morning, for three hours. I get THREE HOURS A WEEK! It's not enough.

So, we've been looking at preschool and daycare options. Just for Riley to go a few mornings a week for a few hours. I'd like to see some social interaction and possibly have one or two of his therapy sessions there, when other kids are around. We're so isolated here sometimes. He needs time with other kids, and Jack needs time away from Riley, too. (Well, mama needs it most.)

I've been trying to get over the idea that I would love being a stay at home mom. It is too much for me. I work part time, here and there as a birth and postpartum doula. We need that money and I need that time away. It works okay for our family. I sometimes wish I had a regular job, something a few set hours a day. But I don't know how I'd feel about that. I walk the line between "working" mom and "stay at home" mom constantly. The main thing to say is that being home with two kids under three, one of which has autism, is too much most days. I don't like it most days. But there's no easy solutions. In the mean time, I'm completely and totally exhausted.

DH and I really need time together as well. We are stressed out beyond belief. I am still so much in love with him and need time with him, away from the stress and the kids. We are hoping my parents can take them for a few hours this weekend. We need it.

Changing subject... we will have new therapists starting the week of Riley's birthday (9/14) and I am anxious. I am a bit annoyed to not know the schedule yet, but very excited that he'll have so much therapy. He'll have a teacher coming twice per week to work on play, OT and speech once per week. It seems like writing that IEP was so long ago, that he has already met some of the goals. It was in July. I looked at it last night, and he hasn't yet. He's gotten better at a few things but hasn't mastered them. It will take time... progress takes time.

So, we have the DAN! appointment next Monday and the week after, we start new therapy.

UPDATE: Well, looks like we're starting at least one therapy (with the early childhood educator) next Thursday! Ask and you shall receive. ;)